Mirror, Mirror on the Wall...

This morning I let my dogs out. The dogs NEVER get to roam freely, so every time I crack the door, they get really excited. They can't help it, they love to explore. They try to go as far as they can before I call them back and sometimes they don't come back. I don't like having to chase them all over Tallapoosa county. (Seriously, most days I have to drive my truck down the road. They are that fast. I can easily spend an hour on foot trying to bring them home.) I put the leash on Sophie because she is the most inclined to take off. She runs across the yard and the other two follow. I thought if I could keep a hold on her, the other two would stick around. The problem was I couldn't hold her.

She was dragging me and I was in danger of being pulled along the ground face-first, so I let go. Sophie was gone, black leash whipping behind her like a snake. I was afraid she'd get the leash hung on something and be stuck. I finally grabbed the leash, but by that time, my other two dogs had crossed the fence to the neighbor's property. The passive-aggressive jackass' property with his pack of untamed, unsocialized mutts.

They attacked Queen, my puppy. She was yelping in pain and I thought those dogs were going to kill her. I started screaming for the jackass to call off his dogs which he was in no hurry to do. We had a vicious argument over the fence. He told me I might come home and find my dogs dead. He said I shouldn't be walking down the road with my dogs because that was just inviting trouble. That statement alone astounded me more than anything because I thought all normal people walked their dogs. I thought public roads were open to the public, thus anyone could walk down them whenever they pleased. He said my dogs should be in my house or in the pen. When I pointed out his dogs come in my yard, he said that wasn't a big deal because my dogs are on his side more. In other words, he thinks he should be in control of everything that goes on around here and I should be grateful he tolerates my existence.

I gave up on reasoning. All he was doing was making me more and more angry so I went home with three highly agitated dogs in tow. I thought for a long time about my options-

1. Call Sheriff's Dept.
Problem- no crime has been committed. I can report the threats, but that is just my word against his. Nothing will be done.

2. Call landlord.
Problem- nothing will be done. Landlord will probably get more irritated/angry with his brother, they will have more harsh words, other family members may become involved. Emotions will be elevated, but nothing will be resolved.

3. Hex jackass into absolute misery.
Ah. Now I'm getting somewhere.

I spent some time indulging in a horrid array of curses- erectile dysfunction, ulcers, money problems, boils, mice, fleas, snakes, worst run of bad luck you ever saw...until I realized he probably already has all these issues because he is a nasty little man and nobody likes him. Hmmm. What if things just got...worse.

This is a simple and very effective spell. It falls under protection magic, not curses, so it will work for those who follow the 'harm none' rule. I had great results with it when I lived in the trailer park. All you need is a mirror. Place the mirror facing the home of the offending party and say, 'Any negativity you send to me is returned to you times 3.'

I used this spell in my last job. I'd hold the mirror out, saying the chant four times as I faced the four directions, starting with East. Then I'd go to work and see my enemies struggling with stupid shit. Flat tires, lost phones, jammed printers, lost data, broken watches, miscommunication, coffee being spilled, mix-ups, unproductive meetings, the works. They would be so stressed they didn't have time to mess with me.  You're not causing anything to go wrong, you're just letting the person stew in their own juices. When they decide to grow up, their troubles will stop. Sometimes that's the worst thing you can do to somebody.