one step away from being plastic

I got one of those Internet Information Spam Emails, the kind were your coworkers and friends feel the need to relay some information that they think is vastly important, like what you can do with dryer sheets or some such thing.

Usually I find these things amusing and sometimes I'll actually try it out. Most of them are bullshit but the one I read yesterday really made me think.

It was about margarine and how it was originally designed to fatten up turkeys, but alas all the poor birds died after eating it so the people who invested in this project decided to sell it to humans in order to recap their money.

The email was all about how real butter is better for you than the fake stuff and how margarine is only one molecule away from being plastic. The email went on to say that it wouldn't rot because nothing can grow on it. No fungus can make margarine its home.

And sadly I realized that this is true. I have never ever, ever, ever thrown out a tub because the margarine went bad. It doesn't develop a smell, even if you leave it out all night. You know how often I buy it? About once a year. That's how long it takes to empty a small tub and there is absolutely no difference in taste no matter how long it sits in the fridge.

So I have decided that I have quite enough plastic in my life and from now on it's real butter or nothing.