Monday Menu, Fearful Dreams, & a Substance Abuse Problem

We'll talk about my problem first, because I know you are just wild to find out what I crave above all else.

Diet Coke.

I call it Happiness in a Silver Can. I am completely out right now. There is NONE at my house and I am going CRAZY! I keep telling myself Diet Coke is Not Good and I should stop drinking it. I remind myself that it is bad for my skin and if I drink too much it hurts my stomach. But OMG, I'd kill for a Diet Coke right now and as soon as I finish this post I will be heading out to buy a case. Or two cases.

And maybe it was my craving that spurred last night's dream, or maybe it was the darker content I was reading before bed. I dreamed I owned an occult shop. For some reason, I had to start providing hexes and curses for my customers. I started off with a partner, but she left and I had to do all the work myself. I divided my shop in half, with the 'darker' business kept behind a curtain, and I was so freaked out the whole time because I thought people would blame me every time something went wrong. I was also terrified of offending spirits. I had candles burning as offerings all the time and every time a client asked for a curse, I tried to talk them out of it. The police were lurking about, too and everybody from my friends to my parents to my co-workers were questioning my motives. It was nerve-wracking and I was relieved when I woke up.

The dream is still bothering me a bit, so I'm going to move on to a mundane subject- Monday Menu.

I only had Sunday off. I was supposed to work 8 hours Saturday night, but at the last minute the company stretched the shift to 10 hours. I really hate working Saturdays because I am already tired from working the previous 5 days. When I leave work on Sunday morning, I am exhausted, thus I sleep all day. So there goes my Sunday. On Monday I am confused because it feels like Sunday to me, but I have to go to work, so really I don't have a day off. If you get every weekend off you are a lucky bastard and I am so envious of you.

Since I my time was cut short I haven't cooked much. I did put some food together. This week I am having Beef Chow Mien (from a can, so don't be impressed), Nachos (I put everything in a pie pan and store in the fridge until I'm hungry. It's almost an instant meal.), tuna salad, and I also plan on having grilled cheese sandwiches with tomato soup because when I cleaned out the cabinets last week I found three cans of soup. Eat what you've got.

Other things going on around the House of Dragon-
The leaves are still falling, covering the ground I just raked. I am very tempted to call the Winds to blow the rest off the trees so I can be done with my yard work.

I've been designing fabric. I designed one 'stand alone' and I am now working on a fabric line. I have no scanner, so I am yet to publish my designs. Whenever I get another day off, I'll head to the library. I think if I have several designs to scan it will be a worthwhile trip.

I've also been quilting. By hand. Normally I need to have my head straight before I can sew, but the hand stitching is very soothing. Maybe I should sew a little bit every day to settle my nerves.

And finally, the cards have been trying to tell me something. Yesterday it finally sunk into my thick skull. I keep getting one card over and over- the King of Hearts. This card has a unicorn standing in front of a stained glass window depicting a rearing unicorn. The window is beautiful. The unicorn is, I think, okay. Not great, just okay. It finally occurred to me that I am searching for something unattainable. I can't have an ideal mate, no one is perfect. Maybe I am over-looking a good man because I want the fairy tale prince. Maybe the regular guy is more like a prince than I realize. There is a man I keep bumping into. Saturday he tried to talk to me. I didn't say much. Maybe I should have.