Today brings...Nothing

First of all I want to thank everyone for the kind comments and offering of sympathy. I was feeling very much alone because I wanted to talk to someone who knew AJ and there's no one left. (Kev only met her maybe three times and I lost touch with everyone else and I'm not calling her ex- there's a weird post) While I've never met any of you in person all of you helped me to feel less alone- and I thank you.

I told M to send the box to my parents because I really don't want him having my address. When I talked to him last week he said he would be shipping it 'some time next week' which I took to mean this past Monday or Tuesday so the box should have been waiting for me today.

It still hasn't arrived.

I am concluding that M is still lazy and irresponsible. I'm sure he has all the best intentions of doing what his momma asked, but...he forgot. Or he can't find a box. Or he can't get to the post office. Or he doesn't have the money to ship it.

I spent a lot of time worrying and dreading the box and finally I got past all that and suddenly this morning I realized what day it was and my stomach clenched with nerves. So I was a little relieved that the box hadn't arrived but I'm also afraid M won't send it until March when I've written it off as a loss and then it will hit me like a bullet train.

Aaaaarrrrrgggghhhh.