A Force Unto Itself

Money, despite my wishing otherwise, is a very powerful thing. I like to tell myself that money is not important. Of course, this is not true. Money enables me to stay in my house in the form of rent. Money buys me food. Money keeps me warm in the form of propane. Money lets me travel when it is gas in my truck. Money might not buy happiness, but it does make life a whole lot easier.

Money is an element as much as earth, air, fire, or water. About half the spells I know I deal with money or prosperity which is about the same thing. Money, money, money.

I think about ways to get it. I worry about not having enough. Sometimes Kevin asks me (and he's not exactly joking) if I want to trade him in for a richer man. Money defines my whole life.

I fully believe the universe will provide for me. But I don't always ask because it is very scary to live that way. I'll give you the best example of the universe providing for me:

When I was in college I suffered a computer glitch wherein my professor did not receive my paper via email. In order to keep a good grade I had to had deliver it. Which meant driving all the way back to the cow college on the plains. I coasted there on fumes. I didn't have enough gas to get home. I didn't know what I was going to do. As I was worrying about this, I found $15 while walking across the parking lot.

I was happy- for a minute. Then I realized that tomorrow or the day after I would be in the same boat because the bank balance was very low. I asked the universe to please help me.

When I got home, I checked the mail. I had a grant check. Suddenly life was sweet and I didn't have to worry about money for months.

The universe will always help you. But sometimes I don't ask because a little part of me is saying, But what if I don't get anything?

I can't help it. There is doubt in my heart. It sits right beside my low self-esteem.

I decided I am freaking out for no good reason about the test strips. I am afraid the right strips won't arrive before I run out. I'm afraid the diabetic center won't give me samples. I'm afraid the doc won't write a Rx. I'm afraid won't be able to buy more strips. Which is dumb because I just got paid. I'm afraid I won't know what my sugar is doing and then because I don't know my sugar will drop or spike and I'll be back in the hospital...

This is utterly ridiculous. I CAN get my mitts on some test strips. I have parents who love me and would buy strips for me. My landlord and several of my co-workers are diabetic and could test my sugar or loan me strips. Heck, Wide Lawns doesn't even know me, and she offered to send me some strips. (And Thanks, btw, but I couldn't impose) I'm being so silly. The supply company is sending the correct strips. My next shipment will be here the second week of October anyway, whether they correct their mistake or not.

I am going to take that terrifying leap and let the universe provide for me like it always does. I'm going to trust that I will live despite not knowing the exact number of my blood glucose level. Say it with me All my needs are met and more. I am safe, happy, and secure. I HAVE PLENTY OF STRIPS!

What do you need? Post a comment and I'll think good, positive thoughts for you. Because I'm an awesome Earth Witch, a Kitchen Witch with Attitude and that's What. I. DO!