Alright, My Dears...

Right now, as I write, it's 5am. I'm up blogging so early because I want to DO something and this is about all I can manage in the pre-dawn light without waking up the boys.

I said in my last post (which seems like ages ago) that I had plenty to write about. And I still do, it's just I don't know where to start. This is going to be one of my list posts where I talk about things as they come to mind, not where I write in a nice, neat, orderly fashion. I have no idea what orderly is anymore.

1. Pregnancy. I have 10 more weeks to go! I'm tired of being pregnant. I am all belly. I have no balance and I tend to trip over the smallest obstacles like pebbles and tiny tree roots that others don't notice. I'm hot and irritable. During my last ultrasound, the baby was slightly larger than normal. Before she was exactly the right size. We do not know if she had a growth spurt, if she is shaping up to be a big baby (all Will's biological children were huge), or if my sugar levels are starting to affect her in a negative way (diabetics tend to have big babies because the baby stores excess sugar as fat). We won't know until my next ultrasound if there is any cause for alarm. Right now she's larger than normal but not so big that we should worry. But of course I am worrying because that's what mothers do. Mother is simply another word for paranoid.

2. We are moved into the new house. Mostly. There's still things in the old house like my vast collection of books. And I still don't have living room furniture because we haven't had a chance to go look at anything, let alone buy a couch. I am currently sitting on the bedroom floor typing because my desk is still next door. Sitting on the floor at 7 months pregnant is NOT fun. Actually, nothing is fun at this trimester. I sit until I become uncomfortable, then I stand or lay down until I become uncomfortable, then I walk or sit until something hurts, and then repeat. Most of our trips to town involve me saying often that I am tired. We never get our entire to-do list done. Usually I try not to go at all. Will thinks I need to get out of the house more. I think it would be safer for the general population to stay away from me.

3. When you are obviously pregnant, people want to rub your belly. I find this alarming. Random strangers try to touch me and I freak out because I don't know who these people are or where their hands have been.

4. My father's birthday was June 27th. I kept thinking I needed to call him. Then I would remember he died. It was a thought process I couldn't really comprehend, yet couldn't stop thinking about.

5. School can't start back soon enough.

6. I put my stepson in counseling. I believe it is helping, but as he has only been twice it is too early to see the effects. It some ways it sets us back because issues resurface as he works through his problems. He doesn't like change and he doesn't want to do anything different. I am the only person who has ever tried to figure out WHY he acts out. One of the reasons he went to counseling was because he stole items from my in-laws' house. I insisted that my mother-in-law decide what his punishment should be. She settled on him writing sentences. I warned her it would be a lot of trouble because he hates writing. She said that's why it would be a good punishment. Upshot was- she got tired of dealing with him and once he wrote half she declared him done. Not one hour later, he lied to me. I made him finish the sentences. He always gets out of punishments. He'll whine, pout, not do it, whine some more, and people just give up. Of course he pulls the same stunt next time. Everybody seems to think the counseling will magically produce a better child and no one understands that the adults have to modify their behavior as well. At times I feel like I am the only one who wants my children to grow into well-adjusted, happy adults.

7. Alright, I can't write anymore. I'm uncomfortable and the baby is kicking.