I may have read the cards wrong.
In my last post, I said a new man was showing interest, I read my cards to get a handle on him, and, as always, the cards indicate drama. I just assumed he already had drama. It didn't occur to me drama would be about him but not caused by him.
This really isn't a new guy post. This is actually an ugly-bitches-be-jealous post.
I don't see the guy as anything more than a harmless flirtation. I don't intend to develop a relationship with him. He chats, teases me a little, and that's it. But some people are extremely upset because no one is showing any attention to them.
If you find yourself wondering why no male is looking at you, perhaps you could put on something other than sweatpants and old t-shirts. Maybe you could brush your hair and teeth. Maybe you could have something pleasant to say. Do you find yourself drawn to the ugly guy lurking in the corner with the nasty attitude? No? Hmmm....now why do you think men would find the same thing attractive in women? They don't. That's why no one is flirting with you. Now stop being jealous of me. All I did was shower before work and mind my manners.
Let's called the guy Johnny B. Goode (JB for short) because he reminds me of a Good Ol' Boy but more in a Southern Gent kind of way and not in a privileged kind of way. He's nice, a little heavy but not bad looking, and if I were man hunting he would be on my list. He's 40, middle management, divorced, and very outdoorsy. Every single time JB says anything to me, Jenn starts running her mouth.
Jenn's friend Mary works right beside me. Mary doesn't like me. Which is fine; I don't like her. She doesn't talk to me, she spends the whole night chatting to whomever is beside her. Last night I realized Jenn's comments and the subject of Mary's conversations are almost always identical.
Hmmm. Are they trying to feed me bullshit?
At first I thought Jenn would talk to Mary during lunch. The subject of their conversation would still be on Mary's mind so she would sound out ideas on someone else. I can't help but hear because we're all standing so close together but I never really paid any attention because I thought it was just idle chitchat. Suddenly, Mary's conversations are about other companies hiring and this job might be laying off because that's what they did last year. You know when you hear talk like that you polish up your resume and check job listings. Except I don't need my job so I don't care if I get laid off or not. But Mary doesn't know that. She probably thinks I am struggling to pay bills. She probably hopes I flew into a panic, filled out a bunch of applications, and is praying I'll take the first job that calls. That's one way to get rid of coworkers you don't like.
JB waved goodnight as he left. I heard Jenn hissing about 'sexual harassment'; managers shouldn't show special attention to any one person. I heard Fran telling her to let it go, she was over reacting. Then Mary starts a new story- how the old manager got fired for sexual harassment. His 'girlfriend' also got the boot.
I'm wondering if I'm imagining things. Maybe Jenn's just got a loud mouth and her negative comments jogged Mary's memory. Maybe it has nothing to do with me. But every once in a while, Jenn asks me a question about my personal life, like she's fishing for information. And while Mary makes it a point to show how hard she's ignoring me, sometimes she stands closer to me. Then she starts a story. Almost as if she wants me to hear.
I have to wonder if they're smart enough to do this kind of thing. Then I have to ask myself, if they are smart enough to plan this, why are they bothering? Shouldn't they be smart enough to rise above it? Are their lives so pathetically boring that they mess with people's lives just for fun? I have to ask myself, is it really true? Have I seen them do anything like this before? And yes, I have. I've seen them get rid of two temps. I've seen them run and tell. I've heard them talk badly about other people. I've watched countless times as they have involved themselves into things that are none of their business, gossiped, lied, and then laughed as the dust cleared and people were in a bigger mess than they were in before.
I think it's time to light the black candles.