Sunday, December 9, 2012
Release- Days 5 thru 9
By and large, there is little to no clutter in my house. At times things pile up or I put off making repairs, but about 95% of my house is very well organized. I grew up in a house with wall to wall furniture. I don't exactly blame my parents for the way they are because I realize they are products of how they were raised. Both come from poor families. My father and his brother lived with their grandparents for a while because my grandparents couldn't afford food. Both my grandmother and grandfather worked in the mill. They would drive to Tallapoosa County from Phenix City every Sunday to visit and that one day was the only time my father saw his parents until the next week. They moved every time the rent was due. My father remembers living in 10 different houses before he started school. It was a very long time before my grandparents could provide a stable home. My mother is the youngest of five children. She lived on a farm and her family had an outhouse until she was an adult. Both my parents are reluctant to throw anything away because they believe it can be fixed, patched, or repurposed. I understand their mindset. But I do not understand why they must hold on to everything even when the item is trash or they don't like it. They will keep an ugly chair if nothing is wrong with it. Once I cleaned out the shed and threw away a broken hammer. I mean the head had broken off and it only had one claw. It could not be used. You could neither hammer a nail or pull one out. My father got very angry with me. "Having these things is not wrong! It's not hurting anything to keep it!" I tried to explain useless things take up space and he did not understand at all.
You might be wondering why I do the challenge every year if I don't really have clutter. Everybody has something they can throw away. I threw out my favorite pair of shoes this week. When I bought the shoes, the color was labeled 'mushroom.' The color now is the shade of stale coffee. The soles had cracked and the leather was peeling up. They smelled. They were great shoes, very well made but I could see they were getting old and I had another pair I never wore. I let the shoes go. The challenge forces me to examine my life and if I didn't look around occasionally I might not realize my shoes look like Kmart rejects.
The other reason I do the challenge is because I have plenty of mind clutter.
At the start of the second week, the dreams began. I am working on prosperity and I dreamed I bought a house even though I had no money. Then I dreamed I was trying to buy a car even though I didn't need one. Why do I dream this? Do I think money doesn't matter? Is the Universe going to provide for me? Do I think I need more money? Do I think I am wasting what I have? Should I rethink my goals?
This is why the magick part of the challenge is important. Most people think they will just be cleaning house. No. The housekeeping part is a side-effect of investigating why you live the way you live. Your house is you and the house is the way it is because of all the things you have done up to this point.
Every day I've done the chants. I haven't been able to do all the cleaning challenges, but I have been able to clean something and I have managed to release one item each day. As my dreams become more vivid, I've started seeing things differently and I am worrying less. Some things no longer matter. And the money is getting a little easier to manage. This week I ended up with extra. Next week I'll have extra.
So what am I doing with this extra? Nothing. I think wealth means not having to worry about how things will be paid. Saving is my goal right now.
I am also looking at my future. I had several projects in mind that could earn money but these sort of fell to the side. I'm revising a few, continuing with a couple more, and rethinking others. I let go of the ones that were more trouble than they were worth. Very auspicious times are coming astrologically so soon the time will be right to charge ahead.
We are now in the dark half of the year. The light is coming. I feel the energy shifting, dreamtime fading and now I am ready to be active.